[en] The proximity potential calculations are generalized to collisions involving deformed nuclei, which can also be polarized. It is shown to be strongly attractive for deformed colliding surfaces such that the surface separation parameter must be a strong function of their mass-symmetry as well as orientations. The importance of proximity effects in fragmentation potentials is clearly depicted by predicting the compound nucleus with large mass-asymmetry to be highly excited, in agreement with the recent fusion-fission experiments and the other dynamical fragmentation theory calculations. An apparent choice of the symmetric or nearly symmetric, spherical, reaction partners for forming cool compound nuclei in central collisions is suggested. For oriented collisions, the use of polarized targets is still believed though more experimental data on surface separation parameter is required for a better analysis. Our calculations are made for the compound nuclei with 104<=Z<=114. (author)